Living in the Present.

The most soothing thought that gives me comfort and joy, is that one afternoon on a Sunday, my hair crimped with braids that i slept in overnight, my first ever no-curls wavy hair. The apple scented EverYuth facewash that I washed my face with, It was a pleasantly hot summer afternoon, and as every Sunday passes, this Sunday was exactly the same, mumma sitting on the sofa, the warm ochre shades of the curtains as they were drawn to cover the sunlight, the cool breeze in the hallway and the waft of something delicious from our kitchen. My skin glazed in Vaseline, smooth because i waxed the day before, my body only ever so slightly dressed in a floral dress, the kind you would find as a lazy summer dress. With two or three buttons and a waistline that created a grip perhaps. And of course, lunchtime was the best, this chicken caeser salad, with the cool breeze in the house either from the AC or the fan, the delicious food and the company of my mum, everything was perfect, not a moment did I worry or think about my future, while Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara’s ‘Kwhaabon ke Parindey’ played in my head, ah what bliss.


And today, I sit on the corner of my sister’s bed, in London, constantly having the same epiphany, I’m in London, I stare out of her room to give myself a pinch, the beautiful Victorian houses bring me back to the present, the knarly trees that remind me of Harry Potter and the warm orange lights coming out of the windows from a distance. And I tell myself you’re in London. My life is at a pace that I do not seem to understand, yet I do? Emotionally fragile because of my beautiful grandfathers weakening body with a soul ready to depart, and a mental disturbance that has grappled me by the jugular vein, I hear these eerie birds chirping at the 3:22 am of the night, wondering how I will spend my New years Eve this year, and yet I feel weirdly comfortable, knowing that my body and soul are facing the signs of maturity and growth, as I learn to attain emotional strength while my lips read the word of God throughout the day, my body tired yet nourished with self-love, my abdomen soft and calm, just a small contraction and my heart is ready to burst into tears, tears of joy, tears of sorrow, tears of strength and tears of weakness. Not knowing my future yet feeling at ease, knowing that I trust myself because of the direction that God has created for me, my body drained but my heart gleaming with self-esteem, because to endure so much at once as me is not someone I thought I could ever be.


4.A Letter for Jane Austin.


The 23rd of July 1813.

Dearest Jane Austin,

Halfway through your work called Pride and Prejudice, I was left to wonder endlessly about the life led during the times of Elizabeth Benett. I admire,that during those times, the love and importance of reading and gaining knowledge, of the respect and courtesy men and women had between each other, and the love for literature, were so very important. I admire, Eliza Benett, if I may call her by her nickname, in her being so determined to express her opinion and ensure and reinforce her rights as a young woman in the 18th century.

I am constantly infuriated with Mrs Benett’s complains and cries on how Jane and Elizabeth were about to get married to two quite *reasonable* men but they couldn’t. If I were in the place of Elizabeth I would have probably screamed in rage and cried in frustration of living with Mrs Benett. What I found most offensive, was Mrs Benett calling Eliza rather foolish, when I found Elizabeth and Jane the most understanding and mature of the lot. Kitty and Lydia remind me of the young girls in our world today gossiping about boys and men and being unable to resist their urge to be with someone. 

I would like to also summarize my understanding of the times you lived in. Men would work, while women would stay at home and do what they did best when it came to household chores, and modesty and respect was often observed between men and women. I’ve also learnt that perhaps class and money were of the most important to have a status in society. Although Mr Collin’s money and property did not give him much attention, since according to me he was rather foolish and praised himself irresistabily. Thus, what I admire, is the importance of knowledge and intelligence during those times, which I greatly respect. Learning the eagerness of the younger Benetts to get married should not have come as a surprise to me, considering that some girls in families still consider marriage as the main goal in their life in my world today. 

However I wonder, how women would spend their lives every single day other than reading,studying, and walking in the park. It intrigues me, to think about the interesting lives they must have led. I am not at all considering household women to live boring and depressing lives, but I am quite curious to learn how they lived their lives with contentment. Moreover, however materialistic their lives may be, compared to our modern world, there is something that defines the description of their lives in one word, simplicity. The simplicity of the life of Elizabeth Benett, although understanding her mind was so not very simple. She was content, respected her cultural beliefs but also allowed her own opinions to voice in and thus knew, how to live a content life. I truly admire Elizabeth Benett, her class, her intelligence, her humility and her grace.

I’ve also learnt, the difference between formality and respect, and the importance in being respectful towards yourself and to your society.

Although I have watched the enactment  of your story, it inspired me to read and understand the story through the original piece of literature and through the interesting mind of Elizabeth Benett which did not fail to increase my curiosity after every chapter.

And that I greatly admire, the way you presented your society, and conveyed such a beautiful message.

Thank You

Yours, etc.







MY Jar of “Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans”

Living in a country where Jelly Beans are not a very famous sugar candy treat, my Aunt sent us this huge jar of Gourmet flavored jellybeans all the way from England. I had quite forgotten the scrumptiousness and utter delight of eating a jellybean. This jar ,however, rekindled my love for jellybeans and reminded me of how much I once dreamt of eating “Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans”, and I felt like I finally had a glimpse of how they taste. If you don’t know “Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans”, then you’re definitely not a Harry Potter fan :P. With over 36 Gourmet flavors, the jellybeans of this jar, had some amazingly mouth watering flavors, while some, only leaned towards people with acquired tastes. Some flavours were quite unique and were flavours which I had never come across, which often reminded me of the “Every Flavour Beans” they always eat in the Harry Potter movies. Mint Sorbet, Banana Split, Bubblegum, Candyfloss  Caramel Popcorn and Peachy pie were of the most fascinating flavours I had come across. Of course my top favorites were Sour Lemon, Watermelon, Pink Grapefruit, Granny-Smith Apple and English Blackberry. To all those health conscious eaters who are getting sorely tempted, these Gourmet jellybeans are as seen in my picture, Gluten free, Gelatin free, GMO free and NUT free AND halal!  You know what this means…JELLYBEAN FACTORY HERE I COME!!! Read More